“Work-Life Balance” Is a Myth for Men in Midlife—And What to Do Instead
Let’s be honest, guys—the idea of "work-life balance" sounds nice, doesn’t it? It’s like some mythical utopia where you can crush it at work, be an all-star dad, maintain a six-pack, and still have time to binge your favorite show on Netflix.
But here’s the thing: Work-Life Balance doesn’t work.
Yep, I said it.
Balance is a myth—especially for men in midlife.
And the harder you try to achieve it, the more frustrated you’ll feel.
So let’s stop pretending we can spin all the plates equally and talk about what actually works: Building Alignment.
What’s Wrong with the Idea of Balance?
First off, let’s define what people usually mean by "balance." It’s this idea that you can split your time and energy equally across work, family, health, hobbies, and everything else demanding your attention.
Sounds great in theory, but in practice?
It’s like trying to ride a unicycle while juggling flaming swords.
Here’s why balance doesn’t work:
Life Has Seasons:
Sometimes work needs more attention. Other times, family takes center stage.
And occasionally, your health has to be the priority.
Trying to give equal weight to everything all the time is unrealistic.
You’ve Only Got So Much Gas in the Tank:
Time and energy are finite. When you try to spread them too thin, nothing gets the attention it deserves.
It’s Stressful as Hell:
The pressure to balance everything perfectly can make you feel like you’re failing, even when you’re doing your best.
The result?
Frustration, guilt, and the sneaking suspicion that life is passing you by while you’re stuck trying to keep all the plates spinning.
So What’s the Alternative? Alignment.
Instead of chasing balance, let’s talk about alignment.
Alignment isn’t about splitting your time equally. It’s about designing a life where your actions, habits, and priorities reflect what truly matters to you.
It’s less about perfection and more about purpose.
Here’s what alignment looks like:
Clarity of Values:
You know what matters most (e.g., family, health, personal growth) and make decisions based on those priorities.
Integration Over Separation:
Rather than thinking of work and life as competing forces, you find ways for them to support each other.
For example, using family time to stay active together or finding a career path that aligns with your passions.
Flexibility:
Alignment isn’t rigid. It adapts as your circumstances and priorities evolve.
Sustainability:
You create habits and systems you can stick to for the long haul, not just for a 30-day challenge.
How to Build Alignment in Midlife
Here’s the good news: building alignment doesn’t require a total life overhaul.
It starts with small, intentional steps. Here’s how to get started:
1. Clarify What Matters Most
Take a moment to reflect: What’s truly important to you?
Write down your top 3-5 values.
For most men in midlife, this might include things like family, health, career success, or personal growth.
2. Check Your Current Reality
Are your daily actions aligned with those values?
For example, if health is a priority, are you prioritising exercise and nutrition?
If family matters most, are you spending meaningful time with them?
Identify the gaps.
3. Set Clear, Simple Goals
Forget vague goals like “eat clean” or “work out more.”
Instead, set specific, actionable goals like "lift weights 3 times a week" or "eat 40g of protein at breakfast every day."
4. Create Integrated Habits
Find ways to combine priorities. For example:
Health + Family: Take your kids hiking or cook a healthy dinner together.
Work + Personal Growth: Listen to a podcast during your commute.
Fitness + Social Life: Join a sports league or find a workout buddy.
5. Reassess and Adjust
Life changes, and so do your priorities.
Check in with yourself regularly to make sure your actions are still aligned with your goals and values.
Adjust as needed.
Why Alignment Works (and Balance Doesn’t)
Alignment is realistic. It acknowledges that life isn’t static and that different areas will need more attention at different times.
It’s also empowering because it puts you in the driver’s seat—you’re not chasing an impossible ideal; you’re designing a life that works for you.
Most importantly, alignment is sustainable.
Instead of sprinting toward short-term goals and burning out, you’re building habits and systems that support long-term success.
Final Thoughts: Stop Spinning Plates and Start Living
If you’ve been beating yourself up for not achieving “balance,” give yourself a break.
Balance is a myth. But alignment? That’s doable.
It’s about making small, intentional changes that add up to a life you’re proud of.
So ask yourself:
Are you living in alignment with what matters most?
If not, what’s one small step you can take today to start closing the gap?
Whether it’s hitting the gym, spending more time with your kids, or setting boundaries at work, remember—it’s not about doing it all.
It’s about doing what matters.
Ready to Start Living in Alignment?
If this idea of alignment over balance hit home, then you don’t want to miss our upcoming free workshop:
From Busy to Balanced: A Midlife Workshop for Real Change.
On January 15th, we’ll show you how to:
✅ Identify what truly matters to you.
✅ Create a vision for your future that aligns with your values.
✅ Build sustainable habits to reclaim your time, energy, and purpose.
This isn’t about chasing perfection or juggling more plates—it’s about designing a life that works for YOU.
🚀 Click here to reserve your spot today!
Midlife isn’t a crisis—it’s your opportunity to realign, refocus, and reclaim what matters most.
Let’s make 2025 your year.
